Does watching gay porn mean I’m gay?
Heterosexual men watching gay porn – what’s that all about?
What’s the link between early childhood experiences and sexual fantasy or compulsion in adulthood?
Such questions make for plenty of debate on this site, so I can thoroughly recommend ‘Straight Men, Gay Porn’ and Other Brain Map Mysteries – a recent article by Marnia Robinson. Here’s an excerpt:
Heavy porn users sometimes notice that as tolerance builds for their earlier tastes, they move in new directions in their search for intense arousal. Instead of seeking porn that accords with their former brain maps, many seek out what shocks them—perhaps because “forbidden” and “fear-producing,” when combined with sexual arousal, offer a bigger brain chemical kick… at least for a time. Each shift wires the new tastes into the brain.
… some users’ porn choices, such as spanking or domination scenarios, may be related to subconscious, that is, implicit, childhood memories of which they are unaware. Once activated by the “right” porn, and reinforced with orgasm, such scenarios can more swiftly become compulsions.
Completely unanticipated sexual tastes can arise.
I’m a big fan of Marnia Robinson and Gary Wilson’s research and writing, and can highly recommend their website www.reuniting.info
The whole article can be read here.
I feel angry when I read the amount of theorizing that goes into this. I consider myself bisexual, and it feels natural. To read scientific reports trying to rationalize away something natural (a man being attracted to another man) is insulting.
Hi E
I feel similarly angry when I read homophobic propaganda that poses as scientific enquiry. But I don’t think that’s the message or intention of Marnia Robinson’s article. I just read it again to make sure.
The article explains that there are distinctions between porn-fuelled fascination with gay porn, and actual gay orientation. For porn addicts, these distinctions can become blurred and confusion reigns. The writer links the dopamine rush of porn viewing with other fetishes (such as BDSM), and mentions a similar effect noticed in Parkinson’s disease patients who were given dopamine agonist drugs.
I don’t think she’s trying explain away being gay as a ‘fetish’…?
I’m not gay myself but I am extremely sympathetic to gay people & have gay friends (they are lovely people & dear friends & valued friends) and I still feel very sad and angry that even to this day in the year 2010 there are still people who think in terms of gay sexual orientation as being something odd or bizarre or something they want to fix or get rid of purely out of their own homophobia.
**Gay porn is not something I know much about as a straight man but I know its a big market for the porn industry.
**Two gay women having sex is almost become a heterosexual porn cliche. And isn’t it interesting how many porn stars are bisexual or gay and wont do sex with males.
I have noticed that there does seem to be an entire class of porn (range of porn) which is designed to appeal more to a gay audience perhaps? the more fetishistic stuff, leather, rubber sadomasochistic bondage water sports etc. No! I don’t for a moment think that watching gay porn means you are gay or have a gay tenancy as such. However, one thought I have about this is that seeking out & watching gay porn perhaps does say something about our unconscious views & feelings about our own homophobia? Meaning that sometimes fears & anxieties can be mixed up with ambivalent sexual feelings to, so we can be both aroused & have feelings of fear or anxiety at the same time.
That which we fear most we are also attracted towards such feelings I would strongly suggest are formed at a very age. Usually going back to some point in our childhood or to some kind of situation in our growing up. The same principals can be applied to our sexual fantasies, fantasies always have a theme or some kind & that theme will definitely reflect some kind of unconscious dynamic. However, you cannot interpret these unconscious themes directly.
Only a trained therapist would be able to untangle them & interpret the real meanings, just as the same applies to dream interpretations. (you cannot interpret your own dreams by default nor can you objectively interpret the meanings of your own fantasies). Meaning that even a trained professional psychotherapist cannot be objective about their own unconscious & this applies to everyone too.