I took a hammer to my porn addiction - J's story
I feel as though a weight has been lifted from my shoulders. It has been a long and difficult process but I feel as though I have finally broken free from my addiction. My magazines and DVDs now lie destroyed at the pits of a landfill - a place filled with other unwanted items.
The last and final step to destroy all porn came only a few weeks ago when I removed the hard drive from my computer. I swung a hammer at it until it broke into a million pieces. While I did it, I thought about all the hours wasted. The thousands of pictures and hours of videos I watched on that hard drive. Every swing of the hammer brought more satisfaction and relief.
It has now been nearly three weeks. I have been tempted several times to fall back into my old habits, but talk myself out of it each time. I have to constantly remind myself why I want to quit.
I hope I can continue being successful in my endeavor and I hope everyone on this site is as well.
Thank you J - it's always great to hear about positive action being taken, and winning the day.
When you do feel the old urges, snapping yourself back into your 'recovery mindset' is exactly the thing to do. You can remind yourself just how empty porn made you feel, and how much precious time was wasted. Maybe imagine how you would have ended up if you hadn't taken action to break the habit. Not a pretty picture!
It's helpful and positive to recall the negatives in this way. We're not beating ourselves up or wallowing in regrets. We are simply getting real about porn, and can fully celebrate our breaking free.
Porn Game Over is Jason's self-help plan for quitting the habit. Click here for a fresh approach to internet pornography addiction...
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Hi L, YES!
Hi L,
YES! CONGRATULATIONS!! I know exactly how you feel I did a very similar thing with Jasons support & help. I had a large collection of DVD's that I had purchased over quite a long time and was at a loss as to know what too do with them. I had even tried to sell them on but all attempts at this failed miserbly so in the end I took each DVD disk and snapped them into atleast x4 pieces. Ending up with a large black bin bag full of disk shards and like you I can remember as if it was only yesturday how it felt to get rid of that porn collection. It was one of many very positive steps I took to gain my freedom from guilt, shame & pain of porn. So well done its a major stepping stone to being free from the siren pull of porn.
Yes I'd like to echo Alex's
Yes I'd like to echo Alex's comment above. After reading the recovery guide, I physically broke up my DVD collection and found it theraputic somehow. I haven't yearned for them since.
its awesome to hear about
its awesome to hear about another guys success and i just wish it was the same for me. i have many gbs of porn downloaded to my computer and have purged all of it at least 4 times. it feels so good to hit delete and watch it all going into the trashcan and then i empty the trashcan.
the stupid thing is that the next day, it feels as if I cant cope without it and I download some disk recovery software (hacked software from a warez site) and spend hours recovering it all again. some of the movies are then damaged or dont restore properly, but i feel so relieved to be getting most of it back.
the answer to this is probably that I should destroy my disk drive like J did and I would be prepared to do that. I think I have to. sometimes I cant believe that all this is taking up so much of my life. nobody would believe how many hours every day are taken up by just thinking about porn and getting more, and I dont even watch that much of it.
Hi Jeff, I would say that
Hi Jeff,
I would say that if you destroyed your porn collection & then spent so much time recovering it (getting it back) then perhaps you weren't truly ready to let go of it. Or alternatively that your pattern of use (habit) is still very strong and that sometimes its important NOT to try doing cold turkey. Because sudden gestures like binning a porn collection only back fire's. When a porn habit is still strong or has been long standing the steps to be free from it have to be done very slowly over a sustained period of time and probably with a steady support & lots of encouragement. Jason has been a steady help & encouragement to me over many months. Being free from a porn habit is a lot like dieting to loose weight, you have to stick at it at some level and trying to reduce porn dependency slowly and lessen porns grip gradually and shift the focus of your energies away from porn and towards some other activity. Preferably one that brings you into contact (face to face) socially with others & especially with women.
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