Can't stop looking at porn? - NYDailyNews

Although it made me cringe more than once, this recent advice article makes for an interesting read. Psychologist Dr. David Moore and addiction expert Bill Manville touch on various aspects of porn addiction, and serve up a couple of curveballs in the process.

Dr. Dave risks losing us early on with a tenuous comment about Jesus, but gets back on track with this simple summary of the problem:

A quick bit of self-diagnosis will help. Has your porn viewing begun to harm your health, your job and finances, your family and marriage? And do you continue to do it anyway? That's no longer an amusement. That's an addiction.

Well said.

Upon being asked about 12-step programs for porn addicts and their partners, things get interesting. I certainly have my reservations about 12-step, but here's one you don't hear every day:

I'm going to surprise you and say "no" - primarily because too many of those narrowly-focused groups are filled with known sexual offenders.

Well I was suprised. Instead, he advocates addressing an obsession with porn in the context of larger issues. There's some contradiction when he suggests attending alcohol or drug related 12-step groups, but I appreciate that these issues are sometimes related.

Our experts then consider how addictive behaviours feed on isolation, and how this leads to objectification.

Seeing others as "nasty" sexual objects feeds our fantasies. Turning away from the solitary pleasures of computer porn to focus on increasing your partner's emotional pleasure is Step One. The reward is that this maximizes your own sexual response; removing the motivation, and even ability, to objectify a sexual partner.

I couldn't agree more.